


boom, clap

by wildcard_47



Category: Mad Men
Genre: F/F, F/M, M/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-28
Updated: 2017-09-11
Packaged: 2018-11-20 00:03:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,043
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11324496
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wildcard_47/pseuds/wildcard_47
Summary: "As part of our new love stories week, Buzzfeed recently sat down with several New Yorkers who recount how and why they fell in love." Our favorite MM characters get interviewed about how they got together.





	1. joan and lane

_As part of our new love stories week, Buzzfeed recently sat down with several New Yorkers who recount how and why they fell in love._

 

**JOAN HARRIS, 40 & LANE PRYCE, 54**

  * **Married 3 years**
  * **Two children from previous marriages**
  * **Both work in advertising**



 

**BUZZFEED: Okay. You guys ready?**

**LP:** _(giggling)_ Sorry. I’m sorry. Yes.

 **JH:** Honey, what are you laughing about?

 **LP:** Just wondering how much of this I ought to censor. _(to interviewer)_ Isn’t this going on the Internet?

**BUZZFEED: Yep!**

**JH:** Well, look. I’ll just say this so my husband doesn’t have to worry about it. Our first date was a disaster, strictly speaking.

 **LP:** God, yes.

**BUZZFEED: This sounds like it’s going to be good. Had you known each other prior to going out?**

**LP:** You could say that. We'd worked in the same office for a couple of years.

 **JH:** _(smirking)_ Lane hated me.

 **LP:** What? That’s a very strong word.

 **JH:** You _really_ didn’t like me.

 **LP:** Well, all right. I found you—very vexing, initially. That’s all.

 **JH:** He means he hated me. Probably because I butted into all of his projects.

 **LP:** And somehow that blossomed into a very real friendship.

_They smile at each other._

**BUZZFEED:** **Okay, so walk me through the date. Why was it such a fiasco?**

 **JH:** _(to Lane, muffled)_ Do you want me to—

 **LP:** Hm? Oh, course. I can— 

 **JH:** Lane tells it better than I do.

 **LP:** Yes. Right. So…after I’d finally got up the nerve to ask Joan on a date, and we went to dinner, I was very nervous. And I think she may have been, as well, circumstances—ah—notwithstanding.

 **JH:** Very much. Even when you asked me I just blurted out a yes, because I was so anxious.

 **LP:** Right. Well, anyway. So the two of us met at the restaurant, and one of the first things you mentioned was that you had a little headache. _(to interviewer)_ She was afraid she didn’t look good, which was rubbish.

 **JH:** _(silently shaking head, smirking)_

 **LP:** And although things started out all right, eventually I could tell that something was a bit off. Didn’t ask what it was, just kept pressing, you know. _Are you sure you’re all right? Do you want to go somewhere else?_

 **JH:** He was very attentive. I just kept saying I was fine.

 **BUZZFEED:** **Okay, so what happened?**

 **JH:** _(winces a little)_ This is so embarrassing.

 **LP:** I don’t have to say it if you don’t want me to.

 **JH:** No, no. _(sighs)_ I was feeling very sick to my stomach by that point, and assumed it was food poisoning from lunch.

 **LP:** Which you didn’t tell me. 

 **JH:** Which I didn’t tell him. Because being queasy isn’t romantic.

 **LP:** Anyway, about half an hour into the meal, she excused herself to visit the ladies’ room.

 **JH:** _(deadpan)_ I was sick as a dog.

 **LP:** And after about ten minutes, I started to wonder if she was still in there, you know, and after about fifteen minutes, I started to think, oh god, she’s left the building. If her jacket hadn’t been hanging on the back of her chair the entire time I probably would have run off screaming. 

 **BUZZFEED:** **Wow. It was really food poisoning?**

 **JH:** _(dryly)_ Appendicitis.

 **BUZZFEED:** **Oh, my god.**

 **LP** : Quite. _He clears his throat._ So, probably about twenty minutes after she’d gone, I flagged down a passing waitress to, er, check the scope of the situation. She came back to tell me that Joan was definitely ill, and that she was still in the toilet. And I—may have panicked a bit.

 **JH:** You came barreling into the girls’ bathroom.

 **LP:** Did panic. Very slightly.

 **JH:** Now, let me just tell you how unusual this was. Before Lane, I never let men see me when I was feeling sick. I’d barely let them see me without makeup. When I was dating, if I came down with anything, I’d tell boyfriends that I was visiting my mother, and when I was married, I tried to keep symptoms to myself for as long as possible. My ex-husband was a surgeon, so the second he heard a cough he started trying to quarantine you. And I was used to toughing out illnesses that way.

 **LP:** _(interrupts)_ But that time…

 **JH:** ....I was basically facedown on the bathroom floor. Barely had enough strength to lift my head off the ground. Pale as a sheet, chilled, throwing up, all of it. (sighs) And all of a sudden, I hear footsteps. And somehow Lane comes in and picks me up – physically, carries me – to the nearest bench. Props me up against the wall. And the next thing he did after he put me down was push a plastic bag into my hands…

 **LP:** _(groans)_ Oh, god, I can’t believe you remember this.

 **JH:** Given me this trash bag, or whatever, and the first thing he tells me is: “It’s in case you sick up again in the car. I’ve got a ginger ale up front. We’re going to hospital.” And at that point, I was just so relieved that someone was looking out for me that I didn’t even argue. 

 **LP:** Couldn’t have left you on your own, could I?

 **JH:** _(softly)_ Some people would have.

_He smiles at her._

**JH:**  And you didn't even think about it. _(to interviewer)_ That was the moment I fell in love with him.

 **BUZZFEED:**   **You're kidding.**

 **JH:** You’d understand if you had been there. He drove me to the hospital. Called my mother, let her know what had happened. Spent half the night pacing around the waiting room. And we’d been friends for a while, by that point, so once I got out of surgery and really started thinking about what I wanted, everything was so clear. I just felt safe when I was with him. Really loved. He was special.

 **LP:** _(emotional)_ Joan.

 **JH:** Well, I did. _She smiles at him._ And I just knew we were going to stay together.

_He takes her hand._

**BUZZFEED: I think a bunch of our readers just tried to fake appendicitis on their next blind date.**

**JH:** Disclaimer: it doesn't work on every man. Just the cute ones.

_She grins at Lane._

**LP:** All that over a plastic bag, hm?

 **JH:** _(chortles)_ That, and hanging over a toilet.

 **LP:** _(starts giggling again)_ A fine—romance. Oh, dear god. I can’t believe that was the moment. Can’t we please pick another one?

 **JH:** No. 

_She kisses his hand. He blushes._

**JH:** Eat your heart out, girls. I’m keeping him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New format! This was just a story I wanted to play around with. And I just liked the idea of them sitting down for interviews. Next chapter, I definitely want to do a Ginsberg/Stan/Peggy version, and then write for a couple of other pairings i'm noodling on.


	2. Chapter 2

**PEGGY OLSON (35), STAN RIZZO (43), AND MICHAEL GINSBURG (37)**

**Together 5 years**

**No children**

**Work in advertising, art, and theater**

 

 

**BUZZFEED: You've all got your index cards, right? Joyce is gonna get a picture for the series.**

 

 **MG:** (writing) Nobody tell my pop about this.  
  


 **SR:** Dude, Morris doesn’t even have internet. And he already knows about us. Would you relax?  
  


 **MG:** I’m just _saying.  
_  

**BUZZFEED: So, you guys are the first polyamorous group we’ve interviewed for this series. Is this what a typical day’s like in your house?**   
  


**PO:** For the most part. There’s usually more nudity.  
  


 **MG:** _Peggy._  
  


 **PO:** What?  
  


 **SR:** Aren’t we supposed to talk about how we met and stuff?

 

**BUZZFEED: If you don’t mind.**

 

 **SR:** Cool. Uh. So, long story short, the three of us worked together at the same company for a few years.  
  


 **PO:** I was your _boss_ , dude.

_  
_ _He smiles._   
  


**SR:**  Always with the edits. She was middle management—  
  


 **PO:** Oh my god.  
  


 **SR:** Ginzo and I were the starving artists—  
  


 **MG:** Jesus. You’re making me sound bad! It wasn’t like that!  
  


 **SR:** (giggling) And one night sh—she looked over at us—  
  


_Michael shoves his arm. Stan dissolves into laughter._   
  


**MG:** Okay, Homer. Shut up for a second. Here’s what really happened: this one _(he jerks a thumb at Stan)_ got a _major_ crush on Peggy after they started working together.

 

**BUZZFEED: How major?**

 

 **MG:** It went on for like four years. We thought he was playing it pretty cool.  
  


 **PO:** (smirking) He wasn’t.  
  


 **MG:** Anyway, so, Stan being the Neanderthal he is—  
  


 **SR:** You love it.  
  


 **MG:** —couldn’t keep his hands to himself, real charming, so he and Peggy start seeing each other.  
  


 **PO:** He called me in the middle of the day and told me he loved me. Just like that. It was so cute.  
  


 **SR:** (triumphant) See, Ginzo? I’m cute.  
  


 **MG:** Yeah, whatever. (sighs) Anyway, I don’t really know how I lucked into it—  
  


 **PO:** Are you serious? (to interviewer) Okay, just so you know, we have this conversation a lot. I’m going to tell you the whole story so we can put it in writing.

 

**BUZZFEED: We’re game if you are.**

 

 **SR:** We getting this notarized or something?

 

 **MG:** Shut _up,_ she’s trying to talk, here!

 

 **PO:** Around the time Stan and I start dating—keep in mind I’d changed jobs twice by this point and ended up at a bigger advertising company—Ginsberg was, um, questioning some things.

 

 **MG:** Heterosexuality, mostly.

 

 **PO:** We were all still friends. And so one night, he came over, we were watching TV, and he told me—

 

 **MG:** Oh, fuck, Peggy, don’t tell them the turn-on—

 

 **PO:** —about his _feelings_ for Stan, _Jesus Christ,_ Michael, why would I do that to you? You don’t even like people knowing your lunch orders.

 

 **MG:** (sighs in relief)

 

 **SR:** What was it, Gins? The beard? The long hair? Leather vests?

 

 **PO:** God. You know it wasn’t.

 

 **SR:** My hot body.

 

 **MG:** Stan, you _pervert_. (to the room) I’m telling the rest of the story. Uh. So I was under a lot of stress at that point. Putting it lightly. I went fucking nuts.

 

 **SR:** Gins.

 

 **MG:** What? I did. (to interviewer) My therapist called it a nervous breakdown, all right? Guess it happens to a lot of refugee kids once they’re away from all that shit.

 

**BUZZFEED: You were a refugee?**

 

 **MG:** Yeah. Uh, Kosovo—first time around. My dad adopted me and brought me over here. He was one, too. Uh.

 

_Wordlessly, Peggy takes his hand._

 

 **MG:** (clears throat) I don’t really want to get into the rest, but um, there was some shit I hadn’t dealt with. Including the gay thing. I thought I couldn’t be gay since I still looked at girls sometimes. But I couldn’t—whatever. Stan, can you—

 

 **SR:** Sure thing, kid. Let’s see—I’d kept in touch, so Ginzo and I were still friends, at that point. After he’d gotten some help, laid low for awhile, I was just there making sure he and his dad didn’t kill each other in their apartment. So the two of us started hanging out a lot more, and then hanging out with Peggy. Eventually, we offered him our spare room.

 

 **PO:** Morris kept trying to set him up with all these nice Jewish girls. So of course Ginzo ends up living in sin with two former Catholics.

 

 **SR:** Those matchmaking skills could make any Yiddish grandmother proud. After a few months, the dynamic changed. We’re having fun together, enjoying each other’s company—

 

 **PO:** The sex was pretty great, too.

 

 **MG:** (hides his face) Oh, fuck.

 

 **SR:** He was included in that, too. _He bumps Ginzo's shoulder with his._

 

**BUZZFEED: Hang on. I have to ask. Stan, what attracted you to Michael?**

 

 **MG:** Don’t. He’ll just make up some dumb—

 

 **SR:** Kid’s got a good heart.

 

_Michael and Peggy stare, open-mouthed._

**SR:** Even after everything he’s been through. It’s—look, if Ginzo likes you, he’s obsessing over how happy you are and if you’re sleeping well or if you’re eating enough. He’ll forget to feed himself for two days cause he’s worrying over one of your problems — dumb stuff, even. Give you the clothes off his back if you need ‘em. Um. Not selfish, you know? I’ve never— (clears throat) Well, I admired that. I’ve always admired that.

 

 **PO:**  Wow.

 

_Michael swipes tears from his face with the back of one hand._

**MG:** (thickly) Jesus.

 

 **SR:** Either that, or his Gossip Girl-villain look. Pretty hot, right?

 

_Peggy and Michael groan, and throw their index cards at him. Stan just laughs._

**Author's Note:**

> New format! This was just a story I wanted to play around with. And I just liked the idea of them sitting down for interviews. Next chapter, I definitely want to do a Ginsberg/Stan/Peggy version, and then write for a couple of other pairings i'm noodling on.


End file.
